Hey Everybody

Hey everybody, how have you cat's been ? It is good to be back.

Where you been???

I have been here in Philly doing a lot of things, and I decided to get my internet service back on. But I was talking about, being back here, on this board.

Nice to see you, again, Spanky!



I hope to be around more often
and we'll catch up.

Regards,

What's up Spanky,
Are you living in Philly again?

D.L.

Hey, Spanky,

I hope you can stick around for awhile, bro... When you take off, you take OFF!

Nice Avatar!

Yeah I know Don, I do. And yeah Dave I am back in Philly, I am trying to move to Delaware, and that will be it, I love that state, and I don't ever want to move again. Plus I will not be far from Philly, and Delaware has only 900.000 people not even a million people in the whole state, and a lot of unmolested land. My wife has went her way and I have went mine, so I am taking this time to get things in place. I will be filing for a divorce next month, Don already knows about my separation, but now you all know. So this is where I am at in my life, and believe it or not I am pleased. And I do want to marry again, because I ain't built to be alone. I also do want to start a band, and I have put the word out, so things are coming along albeit, sometimes slow. So this is where I am at in my life right now. I love all you guy's.

That's cool Spanky,
Let me know if your ever hanging around Philly-

D.L.

spanky wrote:Yeah I know Don, I do. And yeah Dave I am back in Philly, I am trying to move to Delaware, and that will be it, I love that state, and I don't ever want to move again. Plus I will not be far from Philly, and Delaware has only 900.000 people not even a million people in the whole state, and a lot of unmolested land. My wife has went her way and I have went mine, so I am taking this time to get things in place. I will be filing for a divorce next month, Don already knows about my separation, but now you all know. So this is where I am at in my life, and believe it or not I am pleased. And I do want to marry again, because I ain't built to be alone. I also do want to start a band, and I have put the word out, so things are coming along albeit, sometimes slow. So this is where I am at in my life right now. I love all you guy's.

I went through it, too , Spanky, (divorce), fairly recently, and it's no picnic, as I'm sure you're experiencing.
Hang in there Bro. My prayers go out to you. All I can say is, time does heal all wounds. Try to surround yourself with people and activities that make you happy. It WILL get better.

Russ

That's really helpful stuff, Russ. My best to you, Spanky. Sounds like you're on a good path . . .

Thank you both, see that's why I missed you guy's. But I am fine, I really am, I am moving on with my life, and so is she. At first it stung like hell, but now it does not. I am looking forward to God putting someone else in my life. And I hope that God does the same for her. I told her to find someone else, and when you can say that, you know it's over.

Of course I wish nothing but the best for Lewis and his wife... My prayer is that they can reconcile. As marriages are supposed to last till death do us part. Like teeth, a marriage is not meant to fail, especially where believers are concerned. But I know all to well that many of them do... I certainly am not here to judge and again, I wish all the best for you and your spouse, Lewis. I would only urge you that should you ever stand before that alter again, I would only hope that the two of you would have a deeper understanding of this institution and God's intended purpose for the two of you as you join to become man and wife.

I always feel compelled to talk with young people that are getting married. So much passion, planning and even pain goes into the making of this single day event. I often wonder how much thought is honestly given to the expectation and responsibility of two people promising before God to spend the rest of their lives together. In many cases I don't think there's enough serious thought and research that's genuinely required of one's self and his or her chosen mate that's given to this massive undertaking. It is a MAJOR decision that is in no way meant to be taken lightly. And it's designed to be that way for the rest of our natural lives. A successful marriage is a CONSTANT work in progress. If you have ambitions that supersede your marriage and your family, then don't get married and raise a family.

I know for a fact that this is a huge problem with high profile people... Musicians, sport celebrities, actors and so on. Hardly ever home, witnessing these drastic physical changes in their children as they grow because the space between the times that they see their kids is so wide. You don't have time to see to your marriage then don't get married!

Spanky, Understand that what you are reading here is mostly me venting, because I hate with a passion to see and hear about failed marriages. This is not directed at you, per se. Yes I hate the fact that your marriage is ending but I understand that it happens and that sometimes there's nothing you can do about it. Sometimes things happen to the point where there is simply too much damage for either side to fix it. Though my belief is that these things should be guarded against from the very beginning and then throughout.

Here's some quick advice that I believe is Paramount for a successful marriage relationship:

Communicate.... NEVER, EVER stop communicating! Not communicating is the beginning process of growing apart.

Never call your spouse names.... You don't want to hurt the one you love. It's that simple.


Fellas, There are 4 and 4 reasons only to ever put your hands on your wife:

1. To protect her

2. To play with her

3. To love her

4. To comfort her

Any reason after these is physical abuse.

ALWAYS say I love you often, and mean it[/b].... If you mean it then the action of showing it will be automatic.

NEVER say the word divorce to one another, not even jokingly.


Hey, Spank, best to you, man.

Don.

P.S. And in case anyone is wondering, November 7th will be Audrey's and my 30th wedding anniversary.

I really need to figure out something to do.... I want to do something nice. Suggestions are welcome.

Hey Spanky,

Welcome back man, and sorry to hear about the current circumstances.

And Don,

For your 30th my suggestion would be to renew your vows in church and then take her on a second honeymoon - back to the same place your took your first honeymoon , if that's possible.

Peace, TED

The renewing of our vows sounds like a great idea, Ted. We were married at the justice of the peace. We didn't want the hoopla usually associated with a wedding as our focus was building a successful marriage and raising a happy family. I put my music career on hold for a good while so we can work on making this a reality. both our kids were planned and born after we were married and we raised them together.

With that done, I now want to show my affection and love for her in a special way.

We've never had a honeymoon.

Spanky,

If reconciliation is even a glimmer,
I have a few suggestions. There
has to be just a glimmer and I do
not need both sides.

You can pm me.

Wishing you the best.

Regards,

Yes, it's great seeing you here again...I guess, for some like me, I've been caught up with stuff. Nice hearing you all agian as well.

Women are like double pedals. You don't really need them, but they sure sound good.

Incidentally, Don - There was
some fine advice, there, in your
post, on the treatment of wives.



Regards,

D. Slam wrote:Of course I wish nothing but the best for Lewis and his wife... My prayer is that they can reconcile. As marriages are supposed to last till death do us part. Like teeth, a marriage is not meant to fail, especially where believers are concerned. But I know all to well that many of them do... I certainly am not here to judge and again, I wish all the best for you and your spouse, Lewis. I would only urge you that should you ever stand before that alter again, I would only hope that the two of you would have a deeper understanding of this institution and God's intended purpose for the two of you as you join to become man and wife.

I always feel compelled to talk with young people that are getting married. So much passion, planning and even pain goes into the making of this single day event. I often wonder how much thought is honestly given to the expectation and responsibility of two people promising before God to spend the rest of their lives together. In many cases I don't think there's enough serious thought and research that's genuinely required of one's self and his or her chosen mate that's given to this massive undertaking. It is a MAJOR decision that is in no way meant to be taken lightly. And it's designed to be that way for the rest of our natural lives. A successful marriage is a CONSTANT work in progress. If you have ambitions that supersede your marriage and your family, then don't get married and raise a family.

I know for a fact that this is a huge problem with high profile people... Musicians, sport celebrities, actors and so on. Hardly ever home, witnessing these drastic physical changes in their children as they grow because the space between the times that they see their kids is so wide. You don't have time to see to your marriage then don't get married!

Spanky, Understand that what you are reading here is mostly me venting, because I hate with a passion to see and hear about failed marriages. This is not directed at you, per se. Yes I hate the fact that your marriage is ending but I understand that it happens and that sometimes there's nothing you can do about it. Sometimes things happen to the point where there is simply too much damage for either side to fix it. Though my belief is that these things should be guarded against from the very beginning and then throughout.

Here's some quick advice that I believe is Paramount for a successful marriage relationship:

Communicate.... NEVER, EVER stop communicating! Not communicating is the beginning process of growing apart.

Never call your spouse names.... You don't want to hurt the one you love. It's that simple.


Fellas, There are 4 and 4 reasons only to ever put your hands on your wife:

1. To protect her

2. To play with her

3. To love her

4. To comfort her

Any reason after these is physical abuse.

ALWAYS say I love you often, and mean it[/b].... If you mean it then the action of showing it will be automatic.

NEVER say the word divorce to one another, not even jokingly.


Hey, Spank, best to you, man.

Don.

P.S. And in case anyone is wondering, November 7th will be Audrey's and my 30th wedding anniversary.

I really need to figure out something to do.... I want to do something nice. Suggestions are welcome.

I love all you guy's I really do, and I thank you. Don when I married her I knew that I had stepped ahead of God, we were very incompatible, and my heart was telling me no, but I did it anyway, Joyce is a great Christian girl, but we were not for each other. The Bible says unless God builds the house it will fall. And also I hate to say this, but I must say it, I cheated on her. I know there is no excuse for it. But I was not getting what I wanted out of her, even though I was married, I was still lonely. So I started to turn to other women for what I was not finding in Joyce. And what God did was he taught me how to be true to a women, and God taught how to love and respect a women, using this failed marriage, that He did not sanction. God has made me a much better person using this failed marriage. We tried to reconcile but it was not to be, well I don't see it with my human eyes. I did not tell anybody, but we have been separated for 2 years 3 months. I did not want to look like a failure I guess. I kept saying, I want to talk to Don, about this, but I was embarrassed. Well I am not embarrassed anymore, because I use this to help others. And if there is anybody who could change the 2 hearts in this marriage it is God, I just don't see it with my human eyes. Moses allowed divorce, because the men had hardened their hearts towards their wives, I might have fallen into that category. I'll say this, if God wants us back with each other, there will be no escaping it. I just don't see it, but I am not God.

Thank you for being so open and candid, Spanky. I realize that this is no one's business but your own so I'm sure we all appreciate your open honesty.

I'll PM you.

D.

Hi Spanky,happy you're back!
thanks Don for the advices (very helpful for me ...)and congratulations for you and Audrey,my wife and i will celebrate next september our third marriage anniversary.Peace to everyone,Stef

Thank you, Spanky for your
kind and open sharing.

Judy and I, in June, celebrated
our 20th anniversary. We were
in St. Thomas, earlier, this year,
celebrating both her 50th BD
and the wedding.

We have been together, though,
since 1982. That math is daunting.



Regards,

woofus wrote:Women are like double pedals. You don't really need them, but they sure sound good.

Speak for yourself Woof, I NEED my double pedal!

That's understandable, Don, I better amend that to:

Women are like floor toms. You don't really need them, but it's a good thing they're stable on three legs . . . or on a nice rack.